Something I read while doing devos today. This was from one of Peter's sermons in Acts - the first one on the day of Pentecost. Starts from Acts 2:14 and continues from there, but I won't be posting that so read it yourself. What I want to address is the crowd's reaction to Peter's sermon:
"'Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.'
When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, 'Brothers, what shall we do?'"
Acts 2: 36-37
Cut to the heart.
Cut to the heart.
They were cut to the heart.
I wonder.
How often are we cut to the heart by the magnitude of our guilt? Do we even realize it? Or have we become complacent within a world that tells us nothing's wrong as long as it feels right?
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Thursday, March 18, 2010
one year later...
I can't believe it's almost been a year since my last post here. That's probably because I tend to post on LiveJournal more (AKA my blog for non-serious business and therefore generally more fun, haha), but recently I've begun to sort of want to post here again. SO I WILL.
Anyway. Really, it all comes back to TC. It's been a year since last TC - which I fully expected to be my last, but somehow God brought me back to TC this year for one night. The last night of the Junior conference. It really felt like a full circle - the speaker, Jim Chen, had spoken during my very first TC, and again, during my very last TC experience. It was kind of cool. He was still an amazing and very inspiring speaker.
I think God brought me to that particular message for a very specific reason. The altar call was very different than all the other ones I've seen before at TC. Jim didn't ask for people who wanted to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Saviour to come up. To be perfectly honest, I don't even remember what he said, but I do remember one thing very clearly - he told us that we really only have to step up and TRY, and God will do the rest. We don't have to do things on our own. Just have a little faith, and God will do the rest. He (Jim) asked us whether we knew where our passion for God would lead us, and told us that even if we didn't have a clear idea or a thought-out plan, all we needed to do was get our feet wet, and God would provide - whether it be resources, people, ideas, or even courage. Courage is the one thing that stood out to me the most. Mostly because courage is the one thing I lack the most.
The other thing that stood out the most to me Tuesday night was the atmosphere of urgency that I just couldn't ignore. There was something building up inside of me that just kicked me into desperate prayer for the people in the room. I literally prayed things like, "God, I wanna pray for this guy [looks at random person in front row] and this girl [looks at random person in front row] and this guy etc.etc." and I had no idea who these people were but I just knew I needed to pray for them.
I just. There are so many things I want to do for God. There really are. I just find it so hard to be a Christian in a world that despises Christians. Because quite frankly, I don't think we've ever seen a more hostile world than the one we live in today. Every day is like an uphill battle, with no end in sight. School is a moral wasteland, more so than ever before. Sometimes I look at myself and wonder how exactly I fell so far.
But. The amazing thing about God is that He's always waiting at the end of the road. When I come home, dirty and shameful and expecting the worst, He runs towards me, embraces me, and tells me He loves me. I am His prodigal daughter, and I don't have to be afraid. It's something that I understand innately and intellectually, but living as though I understand it is a completely different thing.
Have you ever felt so guilty about your sins that you can't even face Him? It's like. Don't. Even. Look at me.
I have no idea where this post is going, by the way. This is just sort of a rambling jumble of thoughts that probably make no sense to anyone but me. Which is totally cool.
Either way, I think this has been the push I needed. I see change on the horizon.
Anyway. Really, it all comes back to TC. It's been a year since last TC - which I fully expected to be my last, but somehow God brought me back to TC this year for one night. The last night of the Junior conference. It really felt like a full circle - the speaker, Jim Chen, had spoken during my very first TC, and again, during my very last TC experience. It was kind of cool. He was still an amazing and very inspiring speaker.
I think God brought me to that particular message for a very specific reason. The altar call was very different than all the other ones I've seen before at TC. Jim didn't ask for people who wanted to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Saviour to come up. To be perfectly honest, I don't even remember what he said, but I do remember one thing very clearly - he told us that we really only have to step up and TRY, and God will do the rest. We don't have to do things on our own. Just have a little faith, and God will do the rest. He (Jim) asked us whether we knew where our passion for God would lead us, and told us that even if we didn't have a clear idea or a thought-out plan, all we needed to do was get our feet wet, and God would provide - whether it be resources, people, ideas, or even courage. Courage is the one thing that stood out to me the most. Mostly because courage is the one thing I lack the most.
The other thing that stood out the most to me Tuesday night was the atmosphere of urgency that I just couldn't ignore. There was something building up inside of me that just kicked me into desperate prayer for the people in the room. I literally prayed things like, "God, I wanna pray for this guy [looks at random person in front row] and this girl [looks at random person in front row] and this guy etc.etc." and I had no idea who these people were but I just knew I needed to pray for them.
I just. There are so many things I want to do for God. There really are. I just find it so hard to be a Christian in a world that despises Christians. Because quite frankly, I don't think we've ever seen a more hostile world than the one we live in today. Every day is like an uphill battle, with no end in sight. School is a moral wasteland, more so than ever before. Sometimes I look at myself and wonder how exactly I fell so far.
But. The amazing thing about God is that He's always waiting at the end of the road. When I come home, dirty and shameful and expecting the worst, He runs towards me, embraces me, and tells me He loves me. I am His prodigal daughter, and I don't have to be afraid. It's something that I understand innately and intellectually, but living as though I understand it is a completely different thing.
Have you ever felt so guilty about your sins that you can't even face Him? It's like. Don't. Even. Look at me.
I have no idea where this post is going, by the way. This is just sort of a rambling jumble of thoughts that probably make no sense to anyone but me. Which is totally cool.
Either way, I think this has been the push I needed. I see change on the horizon.
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